An Orthodox Rabbi Walks into a Gay Wedding [Klal Yisrael]

Photo by Roee Ruttenberg for +972

On Thursday evening, Steve Greenberg became the first rabbi ordained by the Orthodox movement to officiate a same-sex marriage. Yoni Bock and Ron Kaplan exchanged vows before some 200 friends and family members, wearing matching kittels – the traditional white robe worn during Jewish weddings – and marigold kippot. The ceremony took place at the 6th and I Historic Synagogue in Washington D.C. – built as a Conservative synagogue in 1908, the building now houses a “non-denominational” and “non-traditional” Jewish community. In a video posted on +972 Magazine, Greenberg’s joy is palpable as he concludes the ceremony: “By the power invested in me by the District of Columbia, I now pronounce you married.”

Although there will be some who take issue with an Orthodox rabbi presiding over a same-sex marriage, Steve Greenberg is used to navigating the controversial intersection of faith and sexuality. Shortly after receiving his semikhah – or ordination – from Yeshiva University’s Rabbi Isaac Elchanan Theological Seminary Greenberg came out as openly gay. In 2001 he was interviewed in “Trembling Before G-d,” a documentary about gay and lesbian Orthodox men and women attempting to bridge the gap between the LGBT and Orthodox communities.

Greenberg has also written on the topic in his book “Wresting with G-d and Men: Homosexuality in the Jewish Tradition.” While it achieved some success, a number of people in the Orthodox community felt that his views strayed too far from Orthodox interpretations of halakhah – Jewish law. Although the Reconstructionist, Reform, and Conservative movements have passed responsa allowing the affirmation of same-sex unions and the ordination of LGBT rabbis, different branches of the Orthodox movement has maintained a strict interpretation of Leviticus 18 – which prohibits some form of male-on-male sexual contact.

Last year Bock and Kaplan approached Greenberg to ask him to officiate their wedding. Although they agreed to get married in 2008, the couple decided to wait until they could be legally wed. When Washington D.C. legalized same-sex marriage in 2010, Bock and Kaplan decided it was time to have their ceremony. They indicated the reasoning behind their decision in the event’s program: “We were encouraged by the legislation of same-sex marriage in our home ‘state’ of Washington, DC. At the same time, both of us wanted a ceremony that would be meaningful halachically (in terms of religious Jewish law) and create a set of Jewish legal obligations between us.”

Bock and Kaplan asked Greenberg to help develop a ceremony that reflected traditional Jewish practices while affirming the place of LGBT couples within the Jewish community. Considering that Hebrew is a gendered language – where adjectives and verbs are formulated to reflect the gender of the subject – changes had to be made within the inherited text. The couple also decided to remove anything that spoke to gender inequality; for example, the ketubah – or marriage contract – was replaced by a mutually affirming shtar sh’tufim, or partnership agreement.

If anything, Rabbi Steve Greenberg’s involvement in the ceremony highlights the dearth of traditional Jewish ritual that has been adapted to accommodate the needs of LGBT Jews. As same-sex marriage gains traction in the United States, halakhically inclined Jewish communities will need to consider how they can meet the needs of couples like Bock and Kaplan. Until then, rabbis like Greenberg will need to utilize their minds – and hearts – to create spaces of affirmation among observant Jews.

Steven Philp is a graduate student at the University of Chicago, studying for a Master of Divinity in Jewish Studies and a Master of Social Work. When not in the classroom he works for spiritual life, promoting dialogue and cooperation between different student-run faith-based organizations. Steven also volunteers with Mishkan, a progressive, spirited Jewish community in Chicago.  His column, Klal Yisrael, usually appears here on alternating Sundays.

Get New Voices in Your Inbox!